Realization

There is always this one person that you love more than yourself and give everything to. Most of the time, that same person doesn’t love you back the same way. You come to terms with them not loving you back, but you don’t come to terms with how much you are willing to do for them. I think a part of you does all the things in the hope of receiving love.

You know, when you love someone you do anything and everything for them. You just want to take care of them and want the best for them. I mean, that’s just what you do for people you love. But, do expect the same from them? I know you’ll tell me that you should give love unconditionally, but, come on, we are humans. I guess we expect certain things at least. You were expecting a little love in return, expecting a small amount of their time, expecting them to be there for you when you are sad or happy and expecting them to not talk to you as if they were doing you a favour. Actually, I guess it’s too much to ask in return. How can they possibly give so much in return for everything you do? I am assuming it’s too much because we are always disappointed, aren’t we?

Okay, let’s assume that once in a while they do live up to your expectations. Now, let’s count the number of times you told them what you expected out of them and then count the number of apologies you got. After this, count the number of times they lived up to your expectations (that too after numerous reminders). Ever noticed that they go ahead and do the same thing they apologised for 2 minutes ago, and then they apologise again 2 minutes later. It's like moving in a circle. I am sure the number of times your expectations became a reality is the least, and the number of apologies is the max.

This just shows how much they love you even though you try and convince yourself otherwise. You make excuses for them. Easier for them actually, don’t even have to make excuses for themselves. Let’s just accept that you won’t be loved in the same way you love them and save yourself from the misery. Just because they don’t love you doesn’t mean no one else does. Look around you; a lot of people care and love you more than you’ll ever know. So let’s stop fighting for someone who just isn’t worth it.

I understand that after multiple disappointments and apologies also, you can’t seem to let go. You’ll always care and love them even if they don’t. But, everything has a limit. There is only so much a person can take. After a certain point, you stop telling them what’s bothering you because you know the response.

There are a lot of people in your life and out of them there is this one person you love or loved so much that you gave all of yourself to him/her. You even lost yourself in the process, maybe. Do you think that one person is worth losing yourself? I don’t think so. I think it’s time to find yourself back. It’s time to love yourself more than you love anyone else. Take that love energy and invest it in yourself. Grow into a person that would make your parents proud and make the person who didn’t love you back, regret losing you.